the new term for farting is butt boxing.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
