There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
