No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
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