Im at strip club and am horny
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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