I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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