Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Randomize
