you guys were way drunker than both of me
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize
