Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
i think i have herpe
just one?
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
we're so committed to being not committed
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
