where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Randomize
