dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
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