So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
you win again, gameday.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
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