she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
