So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
