I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Randomize
