I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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