This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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