Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
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