Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
