There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
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