We won't sleep together?
Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
