I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
birth control should be required to get into college
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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