i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
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