you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
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