I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
