Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
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