I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Randomize
