He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
he just fucked me for my cheese..
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
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