I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
