I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Randomize
