Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
