you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
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