Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
Randomize
