i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
I think a kid would responsible me up
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
Randomize
