i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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