Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
Randomize
