You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Randomize
