I could have mohawked her pubes.
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
