Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
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