I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
I told her you were a premature ejaculator. She nodded and said "Really? Wow, how long's he been a Pilot for?"
you are both the best and worst wingman ever.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Randomize