Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Randomize
