Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
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