Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
Randomize
