so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
