Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Randomize
