; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
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