life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
