Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
