Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize
