the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
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