i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
